Hi Everyone,

Look, seriously, hello. I’m sorry that I have been mostly posting my idiot pictures. Today is my brother’s birthday and because my brother is the number one mightyamy.com reader and enthusiast (sorry, you other two), I am going to post a jokey story just like in the days of old. Some of this story is made up because I don’t have all of the facts.

This story is about an asshole dog named Canepa. Matt’s cousin found Canepa on the beaches of Puerto Rico during her junior year abroad. Okay, I don’t really know if it was her junior year abroad but let’s imagine that it was, because we can all imagine what kind of cultural wisdoms a college junior might glean from a year on the beaches of Puerto Rico. Anyway, Matt’s cousin finds a dog on the beach and like any normal beach goer who encounters a mongrel dog on the beach in a foreign country, she brought the dog back to the United States. And that is the precise moment at which swine flu was introduced and bed bugs and scabies made their resurgence. Anyway, from what I can understand, Matt’s cousin grew tired of Canepa, or forgot about her or something and Canepa stayed with Matt’s cousin’s mom who is really into holistic medicines. This is not important at all for the story. Canepa lead what appeared to be an outwardly happy existence as an asshole dog with the kind of owner who loves such a dog without any reservation or awareness of the dog’s shortcomings. Canepa was treated to bowls of clarified butter and allowed to nip at children. Truly the ideal life. Then, two years ago, on New Year’s day, Canepa came over to Matt’s family’s house to ring in the new year. Only it appeared that Canepa was really seeking out a dark place to die. I forgot about Canepa for a while (as was often the case with this dog) and then inquired about her about a year later and here’s what happened:
Matt’s cousin’s mom took Canepa on the long journey to the family summer house which is located on an island off of Maine. Getting there takes a long drive, a ferry, another drive and then a hike. As soon as everyone got to the island, Canepa tried to commit suicide by throwing herself off of a dock and into the icy waters below. Someone then jumped in and rescued Canepa. At which point she was probably pretty P.O’ed. Then, around the table while they were all toasting the summer and Canepa’s longevity, there was heard a faint splash in the background. This splash was the sound of an old asshole dog killing herself.